That's That Bullshit Vol. 4 by @Al_Patron
Giant fans are the Laker fans of football. Think about it.
When did memes replace experience?
Imagine being at dinner and the table next to you based their entire dinner convo on what you were talking about? That’s what social media/networking is. Where is your original thought? Why must your day consist of nitpicking and piling on the thoughts of others? Do you not wake up with your own shit on your mind? I wake up with chicken on my mind so I talk about chicken.
For a bunch of supposed “strong” people, the opinions/preferences of strangers sure does control the tone of everyone’s day. I’m weird; I don’t let words on a screen bother me. You know how I know social media is simply everyone’s inside voice? I never walk into a room & think, “Who is that nosy, overbearing person? I want to be around them!”
All the chefs I know should put a tasting event or competition together.
I wonder if anyone knows how the process for award show nominations actually goes?
Obama looks like the type of nigga that says, “My nigga” in a versatile manner. Read the following in his voice…
Derrick Rose game winning shot: “MY NIGGA ROSE! LET’S GO!”
A woman asking him if he knows you: “Yea yea, that’s my nigga, like my nigga like that.”
When a fiend asks him to use his cellphone: “No disrespect my nigga but I don’t really know you like that my nigga.”
His brother starts talking about their wild night at Starbucks in front of Michelle: “You dead ass right now my nigga?”
You know how I know I’m almost washed? This woman said I had a feather or something on my chin & it was a strand of gray hair (I have 3).
Tray Pizzy put out something dope by being himself. I like rappers who aren’t portraying a character; I can watch or create a movie for that.
Patience & understanding have become my 2 biggest lessons and obstacles in the '15.
Colorado Kob plays basketball like a nigga at the park who thinks he’s Kobe Bryant.
They really tried to take the big homie Morgan Freeman out in his prime. “They used to call me Crazy Joe, well now they call me bat man.” Can’t kill the homie.
I’m all for a good debate but I promise you it’s ok to enjoy 2 things at once. We’re human, we’re not 1 thing, so why does our taste have to be singular? Is that a contradiction or actually not being a miserable prick all the time?
People who understand sarcasm & don’t get in their feelings about jokes are my type of people. I’m Haitian, always been, you think I just started hearing jokes about myself? Eat that shit & dish it right back or go home cuz you’re not wanted here. Before I became this heartthrob, I was short & fat, then got tall and had doofy feet with bad acne. Humor saved my self-esteem & sanity, use jokes as therapy.
I don’t give up on people, they just don’t understand me.
I wonder if people ever think that the reason they’re not “on” is because their music fucking sucks?
Won’t complain about the weather in NYC this December but I don’t want my children to grow up with 4 ears.
Can’t remember I was happy drunk, instead of drinking to be numb. Guess that’s why I don’t drink much anymore.
We don’t appreciate Swizz Beatz as much as we should. The man is a true genius.
Speaking of geniuses, Shonda Rhimes deserves a monument.
Love & Hip-Hop is disrespectful to what Hip-Hop means to people that love it. I don’t knock the hustle but that doesn’t mean I have to love or fuck with trash.
God is the greatest comedian of all-time & I’m his favorite puppet. Like I instantly see when he’s testing me thru other people and I’m proud to say I’ve changed.
I really don’t know how to flip pancakes & it’s keeping me from being a superstar.
Derek Fisher always looks like he can’t believe the number he just got at the DMV.
R. Kelly should have been dead a long time ago.
I like speaking to older people because they know more than me & I respect experience. Someone told me, “Writers write because we’re not that great outside of ourselves.” There are so many layers to that statement but I applied it to my present day & it makes so much sense.
Nellz & Cole have to do an EP together.
Watched this exposé on Sandy Hook the other day, fucked my head up.
If I can’t learn from you, I can’t fuck with you. Then again, I have to actually care about what you have to say.
Bet you Adele tastes like honey.
Aight, I’m out, don’t trust anyone who drinks too much coffee, they’ll steal the change out your ashtray for a fix.