Fuck Out My Face: Young Nigga Activities
“Y’all out here chasing Pokémon instead of eating Raisin Bran, and that’s why your lady don’t respect you.” – Community Activist Al Patron
Understand this, young nigga activities has nothing to do with young niggas. Young nigga activities is anything an older dude would be doing now because they couldn’t do it as a young nigga, which in turn makes them look like a little nigga to me. I was always out and about telling myself when I become older (30+) that I would never become the old dudes in the way of young niggas. But since the advent of social media, all these platforms has shown me that older dudes are more little niggas than the young niggas and as a community activist (I’m a pillar of my community) I need to put a stop to this bullshit.
I didn’t even play Pokémon or watch it or what the fuck ever when I was a kid or teen; why the fuck would I be out here tryna catch em all when I have self-respect and dignity? Grown ass “men” bending their wrists in directions they have no business going to take a selfie, your uncles should have punched you in the chest more. Out here on SnappyChatty doing 360 spins in public like you a kid who drank too much red juice and got too much sugar in your system. You all don’t feel the least embarrassed talking to nobody with your phone at a 45 degree angle? Taking pictures and using filters to disguise the fact you some old fuckhead. Getting on the internet asking questions that start with, “Ladies,…” you look fucking ridiculous. Out here taking pictures of your cars like you never been outside of your passenger seat before. Nothing but steering wheel and headrest pictures like you trying to put booking info in your bio. Debating young niggas instead of teaching them because you see them as your competition, knowing dudes like me are not, cuz we ain’t out here doing young nigga activities; we act my fucking age.
Y’all look crazy corny out here; wearing camouflaged cargo shorts with strings coming down to your ankles like you bout to parachute for the army; fuck you going? Get shorts above your knee and wear your sneakers without socks. Out here wearing tube sucks with the Ultimate Warrior spray painted on it like you want to do the Laffy Taffy; ain’t shit sweet about that. All this young nigga activity, going out drinking every single night for motherfucking what? Grown ass men dying their edges and frosting their tips cuz they want to look like Lil’ Uzi Tunechi Yachty, out your damn minds. Eating chicken nuggets in the shape of dinosaurs cuz you don’t know how to enjoy chicken like an adult. That’s the fucking problem, you out here eating cereal with toys at the bottom instead of Raisin Bran and you expect people to respect you as a pillar of your community. Nobody taking you serious as a role model cuz you still call women “chicks” or “Broads” or “females”, even after they’ve told you not to.
It’s the 13th of July and you outside looking for bud instead of filling out a job application because you think your dream as an MC Tweet Tweet is going to come true; you fucking idiot, you’re never going to make it in music. Go pick up a broom and sweep a floor like the janitor you were destined to be and do it proudly. Out here trying to recapture your youth because you couldn’t get the ladies to even smile at you before you turn 27. I don’t have time for you old dudes trying to keep up with young nigga activities, I’m actually embarrassed for all of you and not only can young nigga activities get out my face, so can you.