The Rundown: Game Of Thrones - Season 5
Sansa and Ramsay are the oddest couple of all time. Ramsay is a...well he's Ramsay. Tyrion dropped a gem with that "Who needs wealth when you can make a woman laugh". Grey Worm and the OG had the bang out in a random alley and held it down before the OG caught a massive buck fifty that sent him to the sky. Podrick and Brienne out here riding horses and all about business like EPMD.
Khaleesi has her dragons doing a light bid while Drogon out doing his thing, just figuring life out. Stannis still a hoe. You know what, scratch that, Stannis is a BITCH. What he does to Shireen? The speech he gave her before he did it? I just.....I...I need a moment. It's like everyone around him is evil. Grey Worm hit Missandei with a GEM but can't eem fuck. He told her "baby girl I wasn't scared that I'd die, I was scared that I'd never see you again.".
Tyrion asked for the wine in his voyage to Khaleesi so he could sleep, but ended up getting knocked out. He looks like a yorkie with the beard and no comb, but him and Khaleesi meeting is like KD joining the Warriors. Jorah got touched by the rock men and caught the wild turtle skin. Arya is trying to become nobody while remaining somebody, but still being nobody...or whatever the Many Faced God says. He's actually Catfish. My son Jon Snow got elected to the gotdamn Night's Watch congress. The Many Faced God aka Young Catfish will pop up on you quicker than a YouTube ad. He's also known for talking some red fish blue fish shit, but sometimes you can get with.
Cersei is leading the league in "they weren't shit, let's be real." after someone dies. People still haven't learned not to speak to her with disrespect but they'll learn. Khaleesi still sick about Jorah betraying her, and it's most evident when he's in battle and her facial expressions tell how much she's rooting for him. Arya selling oysters clams and cockles like blue tops. Jon Snow got hawked up like Paul Pierce in the name of some cowards from the watch. The way they say "for the watch" as they did it would have made more sense if it was for an actual Roley, but it wasn't smh.
Sam caught the wild eye jammy just being a standup guy, so his girl paid him back with the light vagina session. Shireen...man. They took the sweetest, purest, most beautiful spirit from me and I won't get over it. I actually had to go light some candles and dry my tears with your aunt's blouse. I loved her. Shireen, not your aunt.
Season 6 bound. I'll holla.