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My 7 Favorite TV Shows Ever

My 7 Favorite TV Shows Ever

“Your love…so good…deserves an encore…” – Cheryl Lynn

The above quote has absolutely nothing to do with anything I’m about to write but it’s playing right now, and she was fucking jamming on this song.

Now that you finished dancing in your seat, here are my 7 favorite TV shows ever, why 7? Because fuck you that’s why!

7. Breaking Bad

First things first (if you didn’t say,“I Poppa” we are not the same) but seriously, if this show was remotely real, Walter White & Jesse Pinkman would have been dead by episode 2. But I guess that’s the magic of TV because the transformation Walt took from a chemistry teacher to a criminal mastermind was beautifully written, and even better executed by Bryan Cranston. Fuck Skylar White forever and a day. My favorite character by far was Gus Fring because of the poise he showed, and his sociopath way of living this double life that Walter 1st admired, then almost became obsessed, and finally jealous of. My favorite episode of the series was Half Measures, in which Mike explained to Walt that Jesse needed to go but did so with analogies, and experience; something I relate to very well. 

6. The Wire

When I talk to people about The Wire, they seem obsessed with the drug/hustling portion of the show, and that’s not how I saw this show at all. I loved the layers of all the characters, and how we learned just how the other side works, so much so that law enforcement asked the writers to tone down some of the writing because they were exposing so many truths about the system. Omar Little, we haven’t and probably won’t see a more layered character in our lifetime; his homosexuality lent itself to the sensitivity, and moral compass of his character to where I didn’t think of Omar as gay, he was Omar, so much more than his sexual proclivity. My favorite aspect of the show was when they introduced the kids or “The Corner Boys” in season 4 and developing them in such a way that I cared about every single last one of them; especially Dookie. The relationship between Mr. Prez, and his students definitely fucked with me because these boys had so much potential and the fact I could see myself at that age, being that bad of a kid but knowing I had the desire for more than what I was displaying in and out the classroom. My favorite character by far was Marlo because again, I relate to being young, and wanting the top spot at any and everything I do, and not taking no or any resistance as a final answer. By any means necessary wasn’t just some catchy IG caption for Marlo Stanfield, it was who we was, and his name was his name. Favorite episode of this series has to be Refugees (I know I know I’m Haitian and whatever “joke” you have probably fucking sucks) but Marlo said one of the greatest quotes in TV history, “You want it to be 1 way…but it’s the other way” and I live by that line because it is I. Oh, and yes the actor who played Marlo is named Jamie Hector, who also happens to be Haitian. Isn’t that some shit Haitian people do though? We just have to let you know who else is Haitian when we discuss them. 

5. Curb Your Enthusiasm

I hated Seinfeld, watched maybe 2 episodes of it and I didn’t laugh at all. However, according to social media I may not be smart enough to understand Seinfeld. How about this? Fuck Seinfeld! Corny ass show, only time I saw white people as a kid was the teachers at school and when the police circled the block.  And even today in 2016, I just don’t “get” Seinfeld; it fucking sucks. Now, how could I say that about Seinfeld but love Curb? I relate to Larry David on a spiritual level, the guy just understands the world as I see it. The rules of society do not apply to LD, and damn sure don’t apply to me; we make our own rules. There is no funnier episode or moment than The Weatherman, in which Larry’s theory seems to be a bit faulty but makes sense. 

4. The Sopranos

I have no reason to like this show; the Italian stereotypes on this show extend to their dislike of Black people, and there were moments on this show that made me cringe, and want to punch someone in the face. However, not only is this my 4th favorite show ever; I personally feel it’s the best show in the history of television. I can’t remember a show prior to The Sopranos that was shot, written, and just felt like a fucking movie. I really don’t know why my Black ass has any type of love for mob style movies/stories because again, they don’t represent me, and I honestly don’t think they’re gangsters; they’re just bullies. I’m thinking it’s the way the “families” are structured, and with the writing being as good as it was, and the performances being as great as they were, I ended up envisioning myself in a lot of Tony’s situations. How would I react to xyz or would I go abc like he did? Then there was the therapy, and vulnerability written into the show where I start to sympathize with Tony but I hate myself for it. Fuck Carmela Soprano forever! Sorry, that was aggressive but fuck her; back to Tony, I feel like this new wave of anti-heroes were birthed with Tony Soprano, and wish James Gandolfini was here to receive his just praise for the true legend he is. My favorite episode of this series is Stage 5, and while this episode was a lot of things, nothing stands out more than the ending where Phil Leotardo has had enough of the fuck shit. 

3. Chappelle’s Show

We live in a time where everyone thinks they’re a “legend” or a “GOAT” but with having none of the credentials or résumés to back it up. The latest isn’t always necessarily the greatest, no matter what 140 characters or less tells you. Titles, and “accolades” are handed out entirely way too fast for my liking these days, none more than “genius” but Dave Chappelle deserves any, and every compliment, accolade, or praise. 2016 was a fucking Chappelle Show skit, and he was so far ahead of his time, it feels like he wrote this year in 2003. The foresight, and unfortunate prophecy seems like it was fulfilled; we miss Chappelle so much that a half-ass attempt on SNL made our mouths water. Shit, Dave (like I’m on a 1st name basis with the nigga) inspired me pre-Chappelle’s Show with Killing Them Softly, when he talked about making lists and I thought it was one of the funnier parts of his routine cuz I’m obsessed with all the little adlibs and quips people throw in under their breath. Like Cedric the Entertainer in Kings of Comedy saying, “…this a cold ass wedding dawg.” Little known rare fact, the last page in any book, script or treatment I've ever written reads, "I do this for my community." That's completely inspired by Chappelle's character Tron, who was in court and said, "I don't want to be embarrassed in front of my community" & I would joke with my little cousins about them being my community, and the name just stuck with them. There’s no way I could pick 1 favorite episode or skit, so I’ll go with an underrated moment, I Know Black People.

2. New York Undercover

Isn’t it ironic that as Black people we have this slight obsession with police shows like it’s not fuck the police all day every day. I’m no psychologist but is it because we want to see them in a good light or some shit? That’s probably some “think about it” shit I just said but fuck it. I was young when this show was on at 9pm every Thursday night after Martin & Living Single. You couldn’t tell me JC Williams wasn’t kinfolk, and that Eddie Torres wasn’t the one Puerto Rican in the crew who thought it was OK to say, “nigga” until we had to jump him in front of the pizza shop. Seeing US represented on TV as the “good guys” especially with a Hip-Hop flavor to it. The music to start off the show going into the intro of the show, to the final scene at Natalie’s where they always had a great musical performer; this show was for US. Looking back at the time now, I was way too young to watch that show, considering the fucking subject matter but even at 11/12 years old, I understood context, and from honestly, I didn’t always want them to catch the “bad guys” but I did want them to kill Danny Up. In my favorite episode from this series I’m still not over Ice-T/Danny Up killing JC’s lady Sandy, what an emotional rollercoaster to put a kid on. I remember going to school the next day, and my little bad ass crew & I didn’t say but 2 words to each other cuz we were all in shock that Sandy got shot. Montell Jordan was on that episode singing his rendition of What You Won’t Do, and it was too much; I’m misty eyed right now, and it’s been 21 years. This series ended the day that Eddie Torres got killed off, and they decided to give Tommy from Martin a job. Speaking of which…

1. Martin

You’d have to be a real fucking asshole to think anything but Martin would be number 1. I’m the biggest Jay-Z music fan on the planet, his lyrics speak to and for me but even Hov could replace the idol that Martin Lawrence is to me. “I never wanted to be like Mike, I just wanted to be like Martin!” That’s some real shit Martin’s fake son told him to try to avoid Arizona. This show is the reason I do anything remotely entertaining with my life. From the 1st time I watched, I knew this was what I wanted to do. What is this? At the time I had no clue but I knew whatever Martin was doing, I had to do that. Martin made me laugh so much, that he made me want to make other people smile, and laugh. THAT is influence, not the bullshit people try to sell you because they want a free pair of sneakers. There’s not a day that goes by that Martin lingo doesn’t get put to use by me. I can’t hear the number 7 or 77 without saying, “Get up off my sev, get up off my seventy sev!” If I’m ever blessed enough to open a sports bar or restaurant I’m naming it Nipsey’s because of Martin’s favorite hangout. Whenever someone doesn’t have a job or we don’t know what he or she does, we call him or her Tommy. Throughout the 4 seasons of my favorite show ever, count them I said 4! We were introduced to characters that are a piece of Black American History. When Hustleman introduced his sales slogan, “You want it, I got, I don’t got it, I’ll get it, so get it while the getting’s good!” We all know what floor Bruhman lived on or what Jerome’s signature introduction was (bet anything you just sang it a little). Pam was better looking than Gina, just in case you needed to know where I stood on that important issue. Gina was a terrible person, she rode in the limo with Tommy Hearns, and when Martin stepped up to be the man, he got his ass whipped cuz she wants to live the high, and fast life. Never understood how Gina could cook slamming meals in 1 episode, and then be a running joke about her lack of cooking skills. That type of inconsistency makes me wonder why didn’t Martin just get with Pam but I’ll save that for another day. I could watch Martin every day for the rest of my life, and not get tired of it because there’s always something to laugh at. I’m producing a documentary in 2017 ahead of the celebration for the 25th Anniversary of Martin premiering because I fucking love this show. Here’s a random, fun but sad fact, I never ever ask celebrities for pictures or autographs, not because I’m too cool, I just know what not wanting to be bothered feels like, so I could imagine what being pestered all day every day feels like, feel me? The exception to this rule are any cast members of Martin because these aren’t “celebrities” to me, they’re icons, and idols. In fact, the only autograph that I have to my name is from Thomas Mikal Ford, who recently passed away, and I have zero shame admitting I cried that day. Picking a favorite episode is impossible; like Jay-Z albums, it’s whatever mood I’m in that day, and that says A LOT.

Well, there’s my list, but I have a very strong feeling that this list will look a whole lot different next year; think about it. 

Putting You On: Dyckman Beer

Putting You On: Dyckman Beer

Photo Series: 92 Bricks - 36th Brick

Photo Series: 92 Bricks - 36th Brick