Far from timid • Caveat Lector

Fiction Series: The Truth Between Friends - Part 4

Fiction Series: The Truth Between Friends - Part 4

…Present Day…

“Well, shit.” Amber says.

“You refuse to let me finish this story, I see.”

 “I just want to know how he caught you, who you are pregnant by, and what you are going to do to fix your life. Because that’s what friends are for.”

…3 Months Ago…

“I’m sorry, I am certain I heard you wrong. Did you just say she’s pregnant?”

“Yes. And its possibly mine.”

“Alex. How far along is she?”

“She is due any day now.”

“So she was pregnant when you first came out to visit me?”

“Yes. I didn’t know. I promise.”

“What is the possibility that the baby is yours?”

“I don’t know. She and I were in the midst of going back and forth, she says she wasn’t fucking with anyone else but I don’t believe it. If it is mine, I will take care of the child. But I don’t want anything to do with Iko. I promise.”

“Where does this leave me?”

“I don’t want you to leave. I’m flying out tonight to come see you so we can sit and talk about it.”

“No you don’t have to do that. I’m not sure I can stomach seeing your face if you come out here. You were dealing with her still when you started building something with me.”

“I was. But you have to realize that you and I were not exclusive. I wasn’t obligated to you at that time. Now? Absolutely, I wouldn’t dare start anything with anyone. I like you and I want to be with you.”

Did he just… 

“Correct. You were not obligated to me. But I definitely recall you telling me you weren’t with anyone else. Not telling the entire truth is still a lie, Alex.”

“Tasha.  I was not lying to you.”

“Alex, the girl sent me videos of y’all in Paris together. On your birthday.”

“Yes, she did go to Paris with me. But if you recall, you and I were only communicating sporadically.”

“Correct. So I have no dog in that fight. I take it back.”

My computer dings as another message comes in. 

IKO: Alex is lying to you. Everything he says in a lie. He knew about my pregnancy from the beginning. 

“Alex, are you lying to me about knowing about the pregnancy?”


I forward the message over to him. I respond back to her:

Really? Show me proof. 

“Tasha. I really didn’t know she was pregnant.”

“You sure, because that email says otherwise.” 

“Tasha. Do you trust me?”

“I do.”

“Well, take my word for this. Iko is a liar. She lies about everything. I’m not sure why she all of a sudden decided to come for my happiness, but I won’t lose you over a woman who is a pathological liar.”

My computer dings, again.

Iko sends me several screenshots. I forward them to Alex.

There are several brief pauses as we both read through the messages Iko sent. 

“Alex, now what were you saying about trust? Because all these messages back up what she said about you knowing about the pregnancy. There are several messages here with you saying you can’t wait for your little family to be complete, you can’t wait for her to have the baby. So what is the truth?”

He is quiet before he responds.

“Tasha, those are old. Iko and I were pregnant before and she miscarried at 11 weeks. It was one of the reasons our relationship failed, she shut me out. Paris was my way of trying to make the relationship work, again. But she completely blocked me out after we got back. She wouldn’t touch me or love on me. I was miserable. I didn’t tell anyone about any of this. You didn’t even know it but you were helping me heal. The random words of encouragement, corny jokes, it all helped me to get over losing a child and the woman that I loved. Iko withdrew from me more and more each day. I found myself being drawn to you, it seemed like every day she backed away, I would find a new thing that made me like you.  Finally, I told her I couldn’t do it anymore that I wanted it to be over with. That night, she and I made love one last time. If she is pregnant by me, it happened that night. Right before I decided I really wanted to pursue something with you and come visit, I hit her up to make sure I didn’t still have feelings for her before I was putting something into being with you. I'm not the type of man who does that. I wanted my feelings for you to be pure. I called her and some man answered the phone. He said to stop calling his girl. This was maybe a month later? I don't really remember the time frame. She called me back and said that she didn’t want to see me again, that she was happy with this new man. She didn’t say it, but I’m positive she was seeing him after we got back from Paris. So the baby could be either of ours but I didn’t know about this current pregnancy when I started talking to you.”

“Alex. I had no idea. I’m sorry about the miscarriage. But I still need some space, this is a lot.”

“I understand. I’ll call you later when I land.”

“Alex, I don’t want to see you right now. This is a lot and I need to process this. You being here in my space isn’t going to help with me figuring this out. I am not sure if I even want to do this anymore. I don’t have the mental capacity to deal with this drama. So let’s do this. You wait until she has the baby and let me know if it is yours or not. If it is yours, don’t reach out to me. If not, come back. I’ll be here.”

“Tasha, don’t be so dramatic. Please don’t shut me out because of this.”

“I don’t want to but this is about me, I’m being selfish of my mental space. I want to sit and hold your hand and support you through this, but this hurts.”

“I respect that decision. I’ll leave you alone until i'm sure I know what is happening with this baby. I love you.”

I hang up my phone.

That was the first time he ever told me he loved me.

I crumble to the floor.

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